This week has been jam packed with good feelings. I know that my Savior and Heavenly Father love me and they provide me with blessings because of their love and my obedience to the commandments. This relationship that I have with my Father in heaven is the most precious relationship I have or will have in my life. I know that my parents have helped me develop my trust and obedience to the Godhead by teaching me the basic principles of the gospel and by being examples of dedication. They loved me and provided for and taught me how to provide for myself in difficult times.
My parents loved me and that blessing has impacted my life in ways that I do not understand. As I wrote a paper on fatherhood, I was blown away by the statistics of negative effects. I know that my relationship with God and self-confidence is a direct result from the love that my dad provided in our home to each of the kids and to my mother.
We talked about the effects of a working mom on the development of a child. My mom began working my 6th grade year and I feel like I did okay. I think it would kill my mom to know that as I look back, I wish I would have had a stay at home mom. I remember me and my parents talking about her going to work and I was excited for her. I was glad that she had the awesome opportunity to go to work. I think that I was negatively affected despite my anxious attitude about the situation. I know that our relationship was affected because I didn't want to bother her after a long day at work with my insignificant day. She did everything right and I blame her for none of my choices. She was always asking and always involved but I wonder if things would have been different if she had been in the home.
I know that I will want to be in the home as I raise my children. This is a huge step for me. I have always wanted a career and have always thought that I wanted to work part time while I had kids in school. I wanted to be the super mom that could give 100% to work and excel in being a dedicated mom, wife, sister and daughter. I don't think that it is possible to give 100% work and 100% at home. The numbers don't figure.  The greatest responsibility that God will ever give me is to teach and raise his spirit children and that is where I want to put in my 100%. I was raised in the gospel and taught by wonderful, faithful parents and I would like to do the same and dare I say better.